Words About Things

Unlike a lot of other people in my generation I never really got into computer games. I was never coordinated or patient enough to get good enough to enjoy them. I had no idea that you could ‘complete’ video games – surely it wasn’t possible to defeat a computer? I used to have a Playstation and a few driving games but anything that required complex controls was beyond my limited skills.

These days computer games seem to have branched off in two distinct directions: complex and immersive with epic back stories (Halo etc) or simple and fun (anything on the Wii, internet Flash games). I played Halo once, it was an unpleasant and confusing experience which I don’t intend to repeat.  As you could probably guess I prefer the simpler end of the gaming spectrum which is why I enjoyed the new Flash Game the insurance company LV= have just launched called Heartsville.

The game has a similar theme to LV=’s recent car insurance adverts featuring the big green hearts floating around. It even features the same song which is going to be in my head for the rest of the day now! The aim of the game is to pilot a hot air balloon through the skies capturing green hearts as you go and avoiding obstacle such as wind turbines and flocks of  killer seagulls. As with real hot air balloons the controls are simple, there is no steering involved, the only way is up (and across).

LV= are also running a prize draw where you can win a real life hot air balloon ride for two which is a great prize unless you happen to be scared of heights.  This obsession with hot air balloons makes me wonder if LV= offers hot air balloon insurance as well as car insurance?

You can even start a league to challenge your friends to beat your highest score, just don’t invite me because beating my highest score wouldn’t be much of a challenge.

1. Dolly Parton.

The country singer and founder of ‘Dollywood’ has insured her breasts for $600,000 back in the 1970s when that was a lot of money. Dolly is understandably proud of her breasts and is quoted as saying “I was the first woman to burn my bra – it took the fire department four days to put it out.”

2. Heidi Klum.

The Supermodel and wife to Seal insured her extra long legs for $2.2 million.

3. Jennifer Lopez.

J-Lo is several things including a daft name and a tendency to sing 10 notes where one would have been sufficient. She is also known for her sizeable backside which is reportedly insured for $1 billion.

4. Keith Richards.

With the amount of drugs Keith Richards has taken it’s amazing that he can get health insurance at all. He has insured his fingers (and thus his guitar playing abilities) for £1 million.

5. Fred Astaire.

At the height of his career Astaire insured his legs for a reported $75,000 each.

6. Bruce Springsteen.

Springsteen’s vocal chords have earned him Millions of pounds over the years, they are now insured for £3.5 million.

7. Betty Grable.

The American dancer, singer, and actress was famed for her perfect legs. She was a pin up icon at the time of the second world war and insured her studio insured her legs for $1,000,00.

8. Michael Flatley.

Legendary Irish dancing star Flatley is worth an estimated £350 million most of which can be attributed to Riverdance. His legs where insured for $40,000,000 in 1999.

9. America Ferrera.

Ugly Betty star and perhaps the world most high profile (ex) braces wearer Ferrera has insured her smile for a reported 10 million dollars. That’s about $312 500 per tooth.

10. Ken Dodd.

Kenn Dodd was completely unreconizable when he hid his oversized buck teeth which is why he insured them for £4 million at the height of his fame.